All in 80s Retro Nonsense

When I was a yoof (that is a young person with immense amount of ‘swagger’ for those of you who are not down with the kids) I spent pretty much every school holiday sat in front of the TV watching films on the VCR player. Ok, when I wasn’t playing football or riding my red BMX that is. My brother and I would be entertained by the moving pictures across the incredibly large television set which could easily kill a young Black family if it ever fell on them. Was it a form of babysitting/child abuse/circus trickery… no. It was a way for my parents to get us to shut the hell up and quit bouncing off the walls from consuming way too many Panda Pops! However... I digress.

What goes around comes right back around again. Fashion and Sub Cultures tend to do just that and numpties like myself jump all over it with an air of coolness thinking we are innovators when in fact the shit you are wearing, the politics you are spitting have already been tried and tested. I often wear 70s inspired flared trousers because I think they are amazing. I probably look like a twat… but part of me doesn’t care (the other part of me does care… a lot… especially when I fall off my bike due to the said flares getting caught in the chain) Oscar Wilde once said “Most people are other people. Their thoughts are someone else’s opinions, their lives a mimicry, their passions a quotation" and the fine Irish man was right.


I first read The Outsiders by S.E Hinton at school and I did think that it wasn’t ‘all that’ to be fair. Ok ok I actually thought it was a big pile of shit… not gonna lie. There were just too many pages, too many weird names and too many essays I had to write on the subject. Basically it was the fact that I had to study the book instead of enjoying the story which ripped out all the sweet contentment leaving me void of any thoughts or understanding of the novel. As far as I was concerned, this book was designed to ruin my social life (well... watching Grange Hill and Neighbours) and highlight to my English teacher that I really do not listen in class. It was only when I saw the movie recently that I got all over excited and wanted to read the book again... nearly 15 years later... and funnily enough I actually enjoyed it this time.
When I heard there was going to be a remake of one of my all time favourite 80s movie, I wanted to high kick my television and give the producers of this new fangled classic film a high octane chinese burn! What muppet would try and rekindle the amazingness of Daniel Son and Mr Miyagi... Will Smith's son and Jackie Chan that's who! Your mum and dad maybe one of Hollywoods hot as hell couples who every man and woman want to have sexual relations with, BUT we've all had a bit to drink so just calm yourself down! The release of the new Karate Kid unnerved me somewhat but of course I had to watch it so I could prove I was right all along. Right? Wrong.