All in Music

I went to Glastonbury for the first time a couple of years ago and although it was truly glorious and I got sunstroke from sitting in the sun… all day…JUST so I had a good spot to see Beyoncé… I initially wanted to kill myself with a hemp poncho. I wasn’t prepared for any of it! I had been to a few music festivals before… but nothing quite broke me like the magnitude of Glasto. The walk from the car to the camp site was horrendous, and as I lay on the grass refusing to move from the pain of walking through mud with an oversized back pack and copious cans of cider in a broken Tesco bag… I had to blink back my tears! They said this would be fun… so why do I just want to vomit with exhaustion?! However after my mini diva strop and an encouraging text from a friend to say “get a grip and stop being a drama queen!” I fixed up… looked as sharp as hammered shit… and got my festival on! With this in mind, here are a few don’ts for having the greatest music festival experience ever. Well... one that doesn’t fuck too much with your chi!
I have just listened to the entire Ultimate Collection of… Steps. Yes you read that shit right! The pop-tastic 5 piece British group who were big in the charts in the late 90s.  Not only did I listen to the album in its entirety without skipping tracks or attempting to perforate my ear drums with a Bic ballpoint pen, I bloody enjoyed it! I still can visualise the horrendous camp music videos in my head and so as I sat at my desk ‘working’ I was throwing some unbelievable shapes to 5,6,7,8! However when it came to the lyrics I found that my memory was rather hazy/massively altered. Like I know the lyrics… but what I remembered way back when were just in fact actual words I made up! And so now when I go to sing impressively out of tune in the comfort of my own home… my brain is just reciting the made up versions of the song. This got me thinking…